Rest Won’t Restore You. God’s Presence Will

← Back to Blog

Rest Won’t Restore You. God’s Presence Will

There are few things more relaxing than a jacuzzi.

The hot water soothes the muscles. The jets break down knots. The steam calms your breathing. The joy of it is only compounded when you’re surrounded by a cold night or snowy weather: the splendid contrast proving how much better it is to be within than out.

But not everyone knows this. Some people, without realizing it, are trying to rest while sitting on the porch in a cold snap. They think they’re relaxing — but all they’re doing is getting colder!

Were there anyone in our lives in that position, we wouldn’t describe the jacuzzi to them. We’d insist they get in the jacuzzi!

God’s presence works the same way: knowing about it is nothing compared to being in it. And for people who have burned out that difference is everything.

Built to fail

Much of life is lived trying to earn an identity.

We earn our spot on the team.
We earn the grade.
We earn our acceptance to our school of choice.
We earn our jobs, promotions, and salaries.

The problem is that all of these earned identities are conditional: they are contingent on us and our abilities. This means that if we fail, we lose everything: our sense of self, worth, and value. And whether we actually fail or not is almost beside the point. The fear of failure alone is enough to rob us of our peace and clarity.

This is why most people hasten through life at a pace that refuses any introspection or reflection: any time not spent earning feels like time wasted. And what is worse than waste for people who are trying to earn everything?

Unfortunately, succeeding is no better than failing. We climb to the top of our ambitions to discover the air is thin and that nothing grows above tree line. But where else are we supposed to go? The path only seems to go up and everyone behind us is clamoring to join us. So we continue living at an elevation we were never designed for. The accumulated weight of our egos, accomplishments, responsibilities eventually betrays us and causes our knees to buckle and, inevitably, to collapse.

The problem with an earned identity is structural: we build ourselves on the wrong foundation. Every performance-based sense of self has an expiration date built into it. You’re only ever going to be as good as your last game. You will never be at ease, and you will never be at rest. Even the good earned identities – the ones you worked hard for and deserve – inevitably collapse under their own weight. Burnout isn’t a failure of effort. It’s the natural end state of an identity contingent on what we do.

This is partly why burnout can be such a disorienting experience. We may have the dream job, the title or position we’ve fought and worked hard for, all of the accomplishments that we wanted for so long – and still find ourselves crumbling. Our whole selves were never meant to fit in the two-dimensional box of a job title or organizational role. Yet, people everywhere continue to cram everything that they are into boxes never built to hold them.

It’s a wonder that people last as long as they do.

---

Download my free 72-Hour Burnout Recovery Guide -- a practical faith-based resource to help you begin recovering what burnout took from you. It's free, and it's where we start the journey back.

---

You must become like children.

Some of the most confusing, even unlikable, people make so much more sense when we consider the families they were born into. The people who raise us and the environment in which we are raised explain our idiosyncrasies, insecurities, abilities, gifts, interests, and personalities. Likewise, the brothers and sisters we have, each with their own unique impact on our lives, make a significant impact on the people we become.

This point is simple, but no less profound: people make the most sense when you consider them less as coworkers and more as children. People become the most comprehensible, and the most lovable, when you consider who they are, who they’ve always been, as children.

Perhaps the significance of this only becomes evident when we consider Jesus’s words:

“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.”

— (Matthew 18:3-5)

Children are the only ones who are freely given the greatest privilege and rank in God’s kingdom. Why is this? Jesus tells us it’s for no other reason than that the Father is drawing children:

“No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

— (John 6:44)

Only those the Father calls end up receiving Jesus. But who does the Father call? Children! Perhaps we are beginning to recognize the point. Paul brings it into complete clarity for us:

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will – to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.”

— (Ephesians 1:3-6)

The Father calls, chooses, children. In fact, that is what a life’s calling is, to be found by the Father who is calling! We are told that even before God is creator, he is a Father – and it is on the basis of this fatherhood that he chooses whom he wills and desires. It turns out that the ones he chooses are the ones who will most beautifully and gloriously reveal how radiantly good, glorious, gracious a Father he is – he picks the orphans who could never earn their place:

“Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things – and the things that are not to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.”

— (1 Corinthians 1:26-29)

The Father chooses, in Jesus Christ, to adopt the orphans who could never deserve him, impress him, pay him back, or otherwise commend themselves to him. And he did this to demonstrate the glorious gift of his graft. This gift comes with it the pre-eminent, cosmic, and eternal identity we were meant to have: children of God.

It is only through Jesus Christ, the one who took what we deserve and gives us what he deserves, that we are freely given this identity.

Whether we accept it or not, we are orphaned children in this world looking – and being looked – for a Father who declares, once and for all, who and whose we are.

The real reason people make the most sense when you consider them as children is because that is our cosmic, eternal, hidden identity! The human story only makes sense when the prodigal journeys we undertake find their terminus into the arms of the God who is seeking and saving the lost (Luke 19:10).

Additionally, it is “through Jesus Christ” that this adoption is given – meaning, that the Father knew full well all our sins, shortcomings, failings, and limitations and willingly chose us anyway! It was in light of our failures that the Father chose to “lavish” us with grace (Ephesians 1:8). They were the qualification for the scandalous selection of his children! Of course, everyone has enough sins and shortcomings to qualify for this (“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” Romans 3:23) but only those who choose to be seen as sinners and repent are given this free gift (“There will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who need no repentance,” Luke 15:7).

He is under no compulsion to do this, but does so out of “his pleasure and will” (Ephesians 1:5) – he willingly chose this of all possible worlds and timelines to create!

More than this, Christ willingly takes on everything we deserve so that he can freely give us everything he deserves! This is how he has “blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ” (Ephesians 1:3). The most profound things and blessings are given to you, not earned by you. At a moment’s notice, all peace, joy, perspective, wisdom, and gratitude is yours at the moment that you earnestly ask to receive it. You have all the reason you need to avail yourself of all of it – it is your adoptive right to ask of it all in Christ!

In Christ, our failures qualify us for God’s restoration.
In Christ, our pain includes us in God’s promises.
In Christ, our limits become the contact point with God’s Spirit.
In Christ, our sins are the cracks by which God’s grace sneaks into our lives.

All that remains is that we receive what he freely gives.

Falling & Failing into the Father’s Arms

How do we receive what he’s freely given? You fall and fail into his arms.

Cold? Good! It means you’re dissatisfied with the other ways of finding warmth.

The way this looks for us on a weekly basis is a prayerful encounter that is both spontaneous and structured: it is spontaneous in that each week brings a new host of spiritual, emotional, psychological, and physical burdens that must be brought into our Father’s presence, and it is structured in that it will always predictably return to what he has done for us in Christ. This spontaneous-structure is always fresh and it is always grounded: we are genuinely bringing the burdens of our heart into his secure, unchanging promises and presence.

This must be an intentional, regular time if it is to have the sustained impact of restoring our sense of identity, and to offer the real recovery that lasts for burned out people. We will also progressively realize that the other ways of resting were not doing anything for us. (A note before you begin: this practice works best after you have physically rested. Spiritually frayed people and physically depleted people are often the same person. Start with sleep. Then come to this. I will be going into this in a later blog post next week).

This entire practice will feel counterintuitive for people who have spent their lives earning. But you must stop. Stopping – truly stopping – is the hardest part. Yet, this is what getting in the warm water of his presence looks like. Firstly, find a quiet place where you can meaningfully focus on the Bible, prayer, and genuinely reflect and introspect. Then, go through the prayer structure listed out below:

1 - Prayerfully Reflect: “What anxieties am I bringing to prayer today?”

Whatever anxieties, distractions, or looming responsibilities and burdens are the first clue for us to dive into. They are the things that are gnawing at our sense of peace, self, and our ability to see ourselves and life clearly. These could also be specific words that were said this past week by our family, friends, coworkers, bosses, or otherwise that continue to haunt us. Write out each of the different things that come to mind or otherwise make a mental note of them. Reflect on the impact that each of these has had, why they impact you (it may not be readily clear at first), and how your heart is being impacted by them.

2 - Prayerfully Reflect: “Do I believe that these anxieties reflect on my core value and identity?” AND/OR “If my worst fears came about in this area, how would I react?”

Can you only hold together if their opinion of you is a bad one? Is your job on the line with this presentation? Are you uncertain whether you’ll be able to provide for your family? All of this is what we are meant to get to the bottom of. Often, it is less about the anxieties we face on a weekly basis, and more about how they rhyme with our core fears and insecurities. Each scratch from the week typically reminds us of a deeper wound. This is why a weekly practice of reflection and self-disclosure in prayer is essential if we are to heal, be restored, and reminded of our identity in God’s sight.

3 – Prayerfully Present: “God, this is where I am. I submit to what you have said and done on my behalf.”

This is when we dive into the warm embrace of the Father who reminds and restores our identity. The two basic components of this prayerful moment are seen in these different motions:

A - His Words over us are the final word of who we are

This will be a break-through moment for us if this is the first time we’ve done this: have you ever truly prioritized his words over the words of others? Have you truly accepted his unconditional approval in Christ over the conditional affirmation of every human relationship?

Or perhaps, if you’ve accepted this before, this weekly moment becomes a regular confession: that his words are still the most important thing in comparison to all the competition that a week brings. Your anxious heart betrays you: there remain corners of your heart where you are still needing to fully accept his unconditional acceptance of you in Christ.

B - His Works for us are the crowning achievement we claim in Christ

Just as we surrender the words of others, we must also surrender our own works — and our need to make them count. This is only when stopping becomes a breath of fresh air: we accept the yoke of Jesus on our behalf. We have been clothed with his perfection (Matthew 11:28-30; 2 Corinthians 5:21)! Everything that needed to be done has already been done (John 19:30)!

Again, this will be a break-through moment for us if we’re doing this for the first time: have you ever truly surrendered your successes as secondary to what he’s done for you? We come to a point of genuine surrender where we acknowledge truly for the first time that this is more important than the other things we aspire to.

We likewise regularly confess that his work for us is still the most important thing in comparison to all the competition that a week brings. While we are tempted to look elsewhere, ourselves or others, our wandering eyes and hearts must recenter again on the only thing worth looking to and receiving again: the finished work of Christ on our behalf.

Better is One Moment than a Thousand Elsewhere

Though the water feels too hot to skin long used to the cold, we settle into the invigorating warmth of his presence. As we linger in his presence, we discover the reality the writer of Hebrews promises: “we who have believed enter that rest” (Hebrews 4:3). And we begin to understand, perhaps for the first time, what the Psalmist meant: “Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere” (Psalm 84:10).

Rest well, friend. Linger in his presence and let your Father remind and restore you of the identity he alone provides.